Liz had a house overlooking a bay,
A ten-year-old cello that she couldn't play,
A garden with pumpkins, potatoes and peas,
And plenty of pollen in flowers for bees.

She also had mice and a dog with a hat.
Most of her friends would be happy with that,
But she wanted more. It wasn't enough
To have such a dapper housemate who said 'woof'.

She wanted a coat that was navy or black
With a luminous blue lightning bolt on the back.
She found such a coat in a second-hand shop.
The sight of the bolt made her skip and then hop.

She wore it for weeks and she kept spinning round.
The lightning bolt went from her neck to the ground,
But after a while, spinning round lost its thrill,
And wearing her coat while she stood very still

Wasn't as good as she thought it would be.
While she was standing she started to see
The thing that she wanted was one Viking helmet.
Her neighbour's black bull was undoubtedly hell's pet.

He'd eat in one bite all the dinner a whale ate.
Her war with the bull would be stalled at a stalemate
If she had two horns on her head just like his.
Her days would be filled with a beautiful fizz.

So she bought the helmet and walked past the gate
Where her foe was passing the time being irate.
They stared at each other. His eyes were on fire,
A frightening gaze that could easily fry her.

But when she returned later on that same day
She watched as the mighty black bull looked away.
She started to gloat to a dance music beat.
The new Viking headgear was working a treat.

But after a few weeks it lost its appeal.
The bull stayed away and she started to feel
That horns on her head were no longer required.
There was one thing that she greatly desired:

A cuckoo clock in which the cuckoo has been
Replaced by an owl who will keep the clock clean.
She bought such a clock but it didn't take long
For her to grow tired of the owl's hourly song.

Now she believes she's discovered the truth.
Being a crime-solving amateur sleuth
Will make her feel happy, just as content
As nuns who give up eating chocolate for Lent.

Her sidekick will be a well-groomed magic fox
Who'll sniff out the clues like her dog sniffs her socks.
Waiting for her magic fox is exciting.
She thinks of the crimes and the wrongs they'll be righting,

The villains they'll catch and the victims they'll aid.
They won't run and hide from a hood with a blade.
They'll be good at sensing when play becomes foul.
They'll track down the cuckoo replaced by the owl.