They say that I was born
  When the autumn moon was full,
When the nurse said 'push'
  And my mother said 'pull',

When the wolves in the hills
  Went back to their caves,
And the great white horses
  Went to hide in the waves.

I learnt to talk in Irish
  At the tender age of nil.
I grew up in a town
  That was perched upon a hill.

The hill was very steep
  And I hated looking down.
Up was good but I was always
  Falling out of town.

Falling out of town
  Has become a local sport.
A line around the hill
  Marks the outline of a court.

People are the balls
  And they're called as 'out' or 'in'.
No one's really sure
  What would constitute a win.

Some will claim a point
  When their ball says 'I'm alive'.
Judges will give scores
  For the standard of the dive.

I sang and jumped for joy
  When I found out I had feet.
I walked for many miles
  Through the fields of corn and wheat.

And I never had the worry
  Of a fall so I was free
To think in big thought-bubbles
  That would tempt a wasp or bee.

The bubbles took my thoughts away
  And left my head a blank.
I felt so light I thought I'd float,
  But sadly, to be frank,

I couldn't float, as I found out
  When I returned to town,
An hour of walking up
  Before a quicker trip back down.

So instead I filled my head
  With ideas and information.
I studied every subject
  To advance my education.

I started wearing glasses
  And I read a lot of books.
The things I said weren't funny
  But I still got funny looks.

My head was full of knowledge
  But I felt it weighed me down.
Each time I tried to swim,
  I'd sink and nearly drown.

For too long I'd neglected
  The other end of me.
I took my feet out running
  In the fields where I felt free.

I ran through streets and hallways.
  I never missed a chance
To rest my head and use my feet.
  I took them to a dance.

I went there with a woman
  Who had many scenic views,
But her hair was just a wig
  And her eyes were just tattoos.

She left with someone else.
  His name was Brad or Brian.
He pushed me out of town
  And I landed on the line.

So he claimed a point as well,
  Which made me feel much worse.
The weight of all my knowledge
  Lay upon me like a curse.

But with my mid-air dance
  I scored a perfect ten
From all three of the judges.
  I could claim a brilliant win.

I won a Christmas hamper
  And a solid silver cup.
So now a sense of pride
  Is the reason I look up.